Say that again?

Enough of that question ok? I have enough of that when-are-you-going-to-have-a-kid, you-are-not-getting-young-any-longer kind of questions. Especially when you are asking me this kind of question as a message to asking me to add you as a friend on Facebook. You think this is a wise move? You think I will immediately think parallel to you cos you manage to know I am married and have no children yet?

Why is it socially acceptable for people to ask this kind of question? I thought only aunties and uncles usually have such curiosity. Why, are you coming of age to be an auntie or uncle already?

This immediately springs to my mind (& Ernest's too, I am sure) when someone like you ask me these questions that why this is your business at all? We dun go around asking the obviously sensitive questions like why-are-you-not-having-a-boyfriend/girlfriend to the singles or why-are-you-stopping-at-one to friends who have one kid and of course the why-you-not-having-kids-yet to the child-free couples (yes, you heard me right. child-free. not childless. you cursing people too?). Not forgetting the why-you-have-so-many-kids to the couples who delights in breeding like rabbits and why-are-you-not-getting-married to couples who are not married yet.

Cos we do understand that these types of questions are kinda PRIVATE and it does not categorise on the same class as the-weather-is-nice-today-hor kind of questions.

I am not caring if you are reading my blog or not, but these are all of the above reasons why we are not having children (yet) and you certainly are welcome.

1) Kids are snot-dribbling, noise producing, shit generating machines. Yeah I know they are cute and can sing songs and dance. Whatever.

2) Yeah, children can change your life. They are an extension of you and couples get along better with children. Is that the universal truth? Could you swear upon anything to tell me this is the absolute truth you want to base your life upon? I dun think so and I am not having a kid just to prove what you said is right.

3) No, we are not infertile. In fact, we are taking ACTIVE steps to prevent pregnancy. You want to know how? OK I will tell you. Not.

4) Bible says God command us to go forth and multiply. He did not say when. And Ernest and I are PLANNING. You have not heard of this word? Yes, decision to work things out and then create. Not try and take over the world like cockroaches. You savvy?

5) We do not like being told to have children when asked when to have children. Enough said. In fact, the more you ask, the more we might want to wait.

So, stop asking me or Ernest such useless questions. Perhaps you should reverse that and ask yourself why are you not moving from your current position in life. Nope, I dun care if it is just a conversation starter. You certainly start a feeling in me to disdain you, but you will not engage me to start on a two-way easy banter just on this topic.

And I am not adding you as my friend on Facebook.

OK, Bitching Minute is over starting now.

I am not against having children. I like cute, smiley ones who dun cry and pee & poop all over the place.

And I am certainly not trying to offend my children bearing friends, or even people who love children.

I am simply telling you not to ask me such questions anymore. OK? Please? OK? OK?